Review - Come Ready Cake Batter Bar

Brand:  Come Ready

Flavor:  Cake Batter

Where to get it: here @ SupplementsGeeks.com

                What’s going on? Another bro-bar that I had to MAKE myself stop eating! I will try anything that has the word “cake” in it. Alcohol, snack bars, actual cake…it’s my kryptonite. I’m not sure how much like actual cake batter this bar tastes, but it does have a pleasant vanilla flavor, and I didn’t get that nasty sugar alcohol flavor one bit! The wrapper stresses that it has “NO aftertaste,” and I found this to actually be true. As always, be careful – the whole bar is 320 calories, so if you’re on a weight-loss workout plan, this is not a snack that you would want to eat casually. I would actually, miraculously, DEFINITELY buy this bar again.       

                 

               

Tastes like:  A sweet vanilla protein shake

Taste rating:  8/10

What’s in it:

Review - Harry P. Fitness Muscle Pasta

Brand:  Harry P. Fitness

Flavor:  Muscle Pasta – Spinach Edition

Where to get it: here @ VitaCost.com

                I can honestly say that I would be fine to never eat traditional noodles again. After falling in love with the Explore Asia Mung Bean Noodles, I was pretty set. After trying these little corkscrew protein noodles, I feel like I’m REALLY set. They’re less squishy/elastic than traditional noodles, but other than that there is really no difference. I ate these Asian-style with cabbage & mushrooms for my weekly lunch meal prep, and made a tuna pasta salad with the rest of them. They were great both ways. One serving has 33g of carbs but ALSO 30g of protein. Noodles are now a healthy food!

               

Tastes like:  Really al dente noodles

Taste rating:  9/10

Qualities:  All Natural

What’s in it:   

Review - Chef's Cut Buffalo Style Chicken Jerky

Brand:  Chef’s Cut

Flavor:  Buffalo Style Chicken Jerky

Where to get it: here @ ChefsCutRealJerky.com

                This review is going to be very short and simple. Do you like hot wings? Then you’ll like this jerky from Chef’s Cut. Boom, end of story. You can even eat it at your desk, in your bed, and in the car without making a mess or getting in trouble.

At 70 calories (1g fat, 2g carbs, and a whopping 12g protein) per ounce, this snack is damn near perfect.

               

Tastes like:  BUFFALO CHICKEN WINGS!!!!!!11!!!1!1!!!!

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Gluten free, Made in the USA

What’s in it:

Review - FitMiss Vanilla Chai Protein Shake

Brand:  FitMiss

Flavor:  Vanilla Chai Protein Shake

Where to get it: here @ FitMiss.com

                I’m always leery about trying a new protein powder, especially when it’s one that I’m going to review, because I always try to drink them “clean” – just powder and unsweetened almond milk. Even my favorite protein powder really benefits from some PB2 and Splenda most of the time, or at least a banana, but this one really doesn’t need anything added to it. I didn’t get a strong, spicy chai flavor from this, but it was still really tasty. It had a great, true vanilla taste, and at 90 calories and 3 grams of carbs, you can pretty much have one of these whenever you want, even a couple times a day. If your tummy is good with whey protein, FitMiss is definitely a great option.

               

Tastes like:  A sweet vanilla shake

Taste rating:  9/10

Qualities:  Gluten free

What’s in it:

Review - Fuel For Fire

Brand:  Fuel For Fire

Flavor:  Triple Berry

Where to get it:  here @ FuelForFire.com 

                This is the best pre-workout squeezer on the market, at least as far as the ones I have tried. Low calories, great taste, and loads of protein (10g!) make this product a staple for me on workout days. The texture is nice and smooth, so you can really pound one of these if you were so inclined…and I have been so inclined during a sugar dip in the middle of a workout. I recommend putting them in the fridge, they are really yummy cold. I have the other 3 flavors (Tropical, Sweet Potato Apple, and Banana Cocoa) on order right now. If you work out AT ALL in any manner, these will give you that initial burst of energy when you’re struggling to get into the zone, right before the endorphins kick in. I highly recommend them.         

Tastes like:  A thick, fruity pudding

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Gluten free, vegetarian

What’s in it:

Review - Vertical Maple Water

Brand:  Vertical

Flavor:  Maple Water

Where to get it: here @ LuckyVitamin.com

                                Can someone please help me? Can you tell me if I like this or not? I’m so serious. I can’t tell. My brain was basically like…you’re on your own on this one. Hargle bargle. It’s water…but a little sweet. But not sweet like sugar sweet, sweet like if you didn’t know what the word “sweet” meant. You might then describe it as sweet, not knowing what “sweet” meant. That makes no sense. But it’s so accurate. It’s maple water, but it’s not sweet like maple syrup. It’s also not void of taste like water. I gave one to a co-worker and she LOVED it. I think it might be like Cable Guy, starring Jim Carey; I had to watch it 3 times, and then I fell in love with it. I’ll get back to you after I drink a week’s worth of this stuff. So intriguing.   

                 

               

Tastes like:  Sweet, no, water, no, sweet….water

Taste rating:  I can’t tell!!/10

Qualities:  Vegan, Vegetarian, Gluten-free

What’s in it:

Review - Fruigees Nothing Beets Cherry

Brand:  Fruigees

Flavor:  Nothing Beets Cherry

Where to get it:  here @ Amazon.com

                Not everybody loves beets. I love beets. However, I love beets in an “on my salad” kind of way. Anytime I have had a juice that has had beets in it, it has had that unfortunate dirt-type flavor. But beets are a superfood, so the more beets you can get into your diet, the better. If you just can’t handle those damn dirty beets and their dirty dirt taste, try this Nothing Beets Cherry squeezer from Fruigees. This pouch is a delicious miracle of cherry wonder. So cherry, so delicious, I bought more of these online less than 5 minutes after I finished my first one. I like to chill them, and then have one right before working out. That fruit sugar really does the trick when I have a long bike ride & some Friends reruns ahead of me after work.              

                 

Tastes like:  Cherry sauce millionaire!

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Non-GMO, Organic, vegetarian, vegan, all natural

What’s in it:

Review - Dark Dog Energy Drink

Brand:  Dark Dog

Flavor:  Organic Energy Drink

Where to get it:  here @ Amazon.com 

                I was pretty excited to try this product. I am constantly in search of low-calorie, natural, taurine-free energy drinks. The packaging is dynamic, the name is cool, and all of the ingredients are derived from plants found in nature. Problem is…it tastes pretty bad. Unsweetened, carbonated prune juice is the closest thing that I could liken it to. I kept trying to drink it, thinking that perhaps it was an acquired taste – but I never even got close to liking it.      

                 

               

Tastes like:  Bitter prune juice

Taste rating:  2/10

Qualities:  Non-GMO, Organic, vegetarian

What’s in it:

Review - Go Vida Grapes & Pineapple

Brand:  Go Vida

Flavor:  Grapes & Pineapple

Where to get it: here @ GoVida.com

                Freeze dry everything you can get your hands on, Go Vida. You’re perfect, everything you make is perfect, and I love you. A lot. I’m not sure what they are doing differently than other companies, but please keep doing it. I love the combinations they make, and the fruit is always sweet and never chalky. I was skittish to try this combo, since pineapple can be so sour when mishandled. There is no sour about this, it’s as sweet and pineapple-y as the non-dried stuff. These are the best pure fruit snacks on the market, for my money.

               

Tastes like:  Big raisins and delicious pineapple

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities: Vegetarian, Vegan, Non-GMO, Gluten-free, Kosher

What’s in it:

Review - Coco Libre Protein Coconut Water

Brand:  Coco Libre

Flavor:  Chocolate Protein Coconut Water

Where to get it: 

                Believe it or not, this was my first time trying coconut water in any form. I have friends who love it, and friends who hate it. After drinking this Coco Libre chocolate protein coconut water, I will definitely be trying more coconut water products. It tasted a lot like chocolate milk that had been watered down a bit, and I don’t mean that in a bad way (it sounds kind of gross). It was just less rich than traditional chocolate milk. I also found this to be a very satisfying 130 calories, and it had a minimal impact on my blood sugar since it has no added sugars. I can’t wait to try the vanilla flavor.             

                 

               

Tastes like:  Weakened Chocolate Milk

Taste rating:  8/10

Qualities:  Fair Trade Certified, vegetarian

What’s in it:

Review - Shelton's Turkey Pepperoni

Brand:  Shelton’s

Flavor:  Turkey Pepperoni

Where to get it: here @ Amazon

                                These Shelton’s Pepperoni Flavored Turkey Smoked Snack Sticks (jeeeeeeeeeez) are long and thin, like those nasty Slim Jims. I don’t really have a “shape” preference for pepperoni, perhaps because I have only found one healthy pepperoni that was good…ever. These are kind of right in the middle. They aren’t bad, but they didn’t knock my meat socks off, either. They’re a bit dry, which is to be expected since they aren’t full of fat, and I also found them a bit over-seasoned. Or maybe it was that they were under-salted? I’m not really sure. Healthy-snack-wise, these are great. Almost pure protein, and very low calorie. I really think this was just a taste-preference for me, not that this isn’t a yummy product. If you have the chance, give them a try – you might really love ‘em.

                 

               

Tastes like:  Drier pepperoni

Taste rating:  6/10

Qualities:  Gluten free

What’s in it:

Review - Quest Nutrition Apple Pie Protein Bar

Brand:  Quest Nutrition

Flavor:  Apple Pie

Where to get it:  here @ Bodybuilding.com

                First off, let me just say that I really like Quest Nutrition’s marketing, packaging, and variety of flavors. I haven’t yet found a flavor of their bars that I feel motivated to devour (their chips however, are another story altogether), but I sure am having a good time trying them all. This bar is strong on apple, cinnamon, and sweetness. If that sounds like your jam, you might really be into this little guy. They are also super anemic on sugar content, which is mega cool. I feel like they could put a bit less of their non-sugar sweetener in these and I might like them better. I felt a little punched in the tongue by how sweet this bar was. I’ll be reviewing other flavors in the future though, for sure.   

               

Tastes like:   Super sweet apple cinnamon

Taste rating:  6.5/10

Qualities:   Gluten free, vegetarian

What’s in it:

Review - Boxed Water is Better

Brand:  Boxed Water Is Better

Flavor:  Water!

Where to get it:  here @ Boxed Water (or your local grocery, if they're cool)

                It’s water. It tastes like water. It has nothing in it, as per the norm with water. Why am I writing a review about water? Because I can, and I want to, and I feel like you should know about this water. Firstly, it gets SO COLD because it’s in a carton and not plastic. (The little bit o’plastic in the spout and cap are BPA-free, in case you were wondering.) So there’s that. Secondly, the packaging is way cool, the marketing is way cool, and the message is way cool. I love this stuff, and I’m probably going to spend way too much money buying it. I don’t care; you can try to stop me. I’ll trip you and let the zombies have you. We used to be friends.

               

Tastes like:   The coldest water in all the land

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:   Vegan, vegetarian, Non-GMO, gluten-free, Kosher, Organic, all natural, Halal…it’s water you guys!

What’s in it: Water.

Review - Quest Nutrition Protein Chips

Brand:  Quest

Flavor:  BBQ Protein Chips

Where to get it: here @ Quest Nutrition

               

                Nutritionally, these are a freaking MIRACLE. 120 calories, 2g fat, 5g carbs, and 21g protein. I feel like anything that can deliver those numbers, and even be HALFWAY edible is a miracle. But these chippies were actually TOTALLY edible. The BBQ seasoning covers up 95% of the “protein powder” taste, and the other 5% goes away after you eat a couple chips. My only complaint is that they are so delicate, I had trouble finding a single intact chip in the bag, and about 80% of them were pulverized into “tip the bag into your mouth” status. If the stares of people pretending that they are too civilized to dump chips into their faces don’t bother you, these are just incredible.

                                 

               

Tastes like:  a BBQ’d baked cracker

Taste rating:  8/10

Qualities:  Gluten-free, vegetarian (I think)

What’s in it:

Review - Detour Smart Bars

Brand:  Detour Smart

Flavor:  Whole Grain Oatmeal

Where to get it: here @ Bodybuilding.com

                I bought this bar for the package. I cannot tell a lie. I love the packaging so much. But then, only 130 calories per bar? Okay! I have been legitimized and it feels so good! Smallish bars, good for a snack, and the calories are right on the money for a casual snack that you’re not going to agonize over if you’re trying to be strict with your diet. They also have 10g of protein, which legitimizes me even more. LEGITIMACY, RAIN DOWN UPON ME! They taste good, fruity, oaty, nice and safe in your mouth. You don’t always have to get crazy to be special.

                 

               

Tastes like:  Fruit and oats, oh yeah-oats!

Taste rating:  8/10

Qualities:  Gluten-free

What’s in it:

Review - Balance Bar, Lemon Meringue Crunch

Brand:  Balance

Flavor:  Lemon Meringue Crunch

Where to get it: here @ Bodybuilding.com

                Lemon is my very favorite “sweet thing” flavor. I found this bar to be rock solid on the lemon, but there really wasn’t much crunch to it. It wasn’t a bad bar, but it did have that sort of chalky protein feel to it, and a little bit of an aftertaste as well. It’s also a 200-calorie bar, and to me it isn’t good enough knowing what other snacks I could wheedle into my face for that amount – an apple sauce, a light string cheese, and a 100-calorie pack of Nilla wafers! All in all it wasn’t bad, but there are better bars out there for the calories, in my opinion. And look at all those ingredients. Yikes.

                 

               

Tastes like:  Lemon-y protein powder

Taste rating:  6.5/10

What’s in it:

Review - Element Rice Cakes

Brand:  Element

Flavor:  Sweet Orange Rice Cakes

Where to get it: here @ Element Snacks

                I’m not hardcore enough to just eat a rice cake. As a child, I ate them with peanut butter and BUTTER slathered on them. While they tasted delicious, that kind of defeats the purpose of choosing a rice cake as a snack in the first place. I was VERY intrigued by these Element rice cakes, already slathered in a rich and fruity yogurt coating, and much better for me than a peanut butter, butter bomb. I did more experimenting with these rice cakes than you would think might be possible – I took bites rice cake-side down, I took bites yogurt-side down, I even dipped a bite in my tea. I'm so out of control sometimes. The verdict is – they are super good. If you’re looking for a different snack because you’re burning out on your ol’ faithfuls, definitely get a pack or 5 of these.

                 

               

Tastes like:  A puffy-sweet-rice-fruit punch to the face

Taste rating:  8/10

Qualities:  Non-GMO, Gluten-free, all natural, Vegetarian

What’s in it:

Review: Think Thin Creamy Peanut Butter Bar

Brand:  Think Thin

Flavor:  Creamy Peanut Butter

Where to get it: here @ Think Thin

                Now that’s what I’m talking about! Just put a picture of a giant glob of peanut butter on your wrapper. I appreciate that. It keeps my expectations reasonable, and it lets me know what your bar is all about. Oddly enough, this is the least peanut-buttery bar of all the peanut butter bars I’ve tried thus far. I’m not sure if it was the coating, or the blend of whey isolate in it, but it tasted a bit like coffee. And of course, I hate coffee. This bar is not really for me, but I don’t think it’s a bad bar. The texture was pleasing, it has 0 g of sugar, and 20 g of protein, which is pretty darn good for this mid-size bar. If you’re into the coffee/chocolate/peanut butter thing, you might really like this one.

               

Tastes like:  A protein shake with coffee in it

Taste rating:  4/10

Qualities:  Gluten-free, Kosher

What’s in it:

Review: Kur Coconut Cashew Bar

Brand:  Kur

Flavor:  Coconut Cashew

Where to get it: here @ Abe's Market

                There is a street fair in Palm Springs, CA called “The College of the Desert”. In addition to the terribly romanticized name, it’s a night time street fair. It’s magical, and Palm Springs is absolutely infested with date farms. The first time I ever tried a whole, fresh date (as opposed to the chopped and sugared ones from the bag at the grocery store) was here, and it was one that had been rolled in coconut. These bars are about as close as I think you can get to that absolutely divine treat. They are tiny little powerhouses of YES. Small but mighty, they will satisfy any sugar craving, and you’ll actually feel like you have eaten a much larger bar. If you like dates, you will adore these. I sure do!

PS – While I admire the fortitude of people who try to maintain a raw diet, I’m simply not strong enough to do so. However it is worth noting that these bars are 100% raw. They are also only the second 100% raw product that I have reviewed that I would eat just because they taste good. Impressive.

                 

Tastes like:  Those dates rolled in coconut that you can get at College of the Desert

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Organic, Gluten-free, Vegan, Vegetarian, Non-GMO, Made in the USA, All-natural, Kosher

What's in it:

The Best of October, 2014!

                So, it's the end of October, and I ate some stuff this month. Some of it, I won't be eating again. Some of it, I might be eating again. And some of it...I have already eaten again. Without further ramblings, here are the top 3 new things I tried (and reviewed) in October, in case talking about them once wasn't enough to capture your interest. In no particular order...

1. Simply 7 Quinoa Chips - After trying these for the first time, I ordered A CASE of the 0.8oz snack-size bags. 110 calories and 7 g protein. Plus they taste just like potato chips & are full of salty goodness. The original review/where to buy can be found here.

2. Field Trip Beef Jerky - No MSG! MSG has 2 jobs - to make things taste good, and to ruin my life. This jerky tastes every bit as good as Evil MSG Jerky, but I don't end up with a racing heart rate and beer cheeks 10 minutes after eating it. Low fat, low calorie, high protein, high quality - I went swiftly to their website & ordered other flavors. The original review/where to buy can be found here.

3. Go Vida Dragon Fruit & Dulce de Leche - So inventive, so unique, so tasty.This is basically a snacking delicacy. I also ordered myself a tiny stash of these bags, and I'm hoarding them like the precious little fruits they are. The original review/where to buy can be found here.