Review: Grandma Hoerner's Big Slice Apples

Brand:  Grandma Hoerner’s

Flavor:  Big Slice Apples, various

Where to get it: here @ Grandma Hoerner's, also available at Target

                I LOVE baked apples and pears, even better if they’re spiced. But…that takes a lot of time and actual planning. These are just as good, and way more versatile. Good hot or cold, plain or with stuff! I dumped some All Bran in a pack to add a healthy crunch. They are also really, really good on waffles or pancakes – if you have a good protein pancake mix that you depend on (I highly recommend Flap Jacked), dump a packet of these warmed up on top instead of agave or syrup and make your knee-slappin’ morning. Good lord. I feel like you could do almost anything with these, and I could go on and on about the possibilities. At some point you’ll stop reading though, so I guess I’ll just leave it at…this is my new favorite thing. 

               

Tastes like:  All of your best dreams, translated into apples and spices

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Non GMO, Gluten free

What’s in it:

Review: Primal Strips Meatless Jerky

Brand:  Primal Strips

Flavor:  Hickory Smoked & Texas BBQ

Where to get it: here @ FakeMeats.com

                Can we talk about texture for just a moment? Sometimes, things taste good, but they have an unbearable texture. That would be clams in white wine and butter sauce for me. I adore seafood, but I just can’t with clams and oysters, for textural reasons. I know soy is a wonder when it comes to making meatless products, but I still didn’t expect the texture of these Primal Strips Meatless Vegan Jerky snacks to be so completely on-the-money. IT’S CRAZY. It’s just like beef or turkey jerky, but not quite as hard to pull apart, tooth-wise. I guess that means it actually has BETTER texture. I could not have predicted this. Low-calorie and lots of good soy protein too, and they actually taste pretty darn good. They were a little sweet to me, more like a teriyaki than a BBQ/smoke flavor, but I definitely didn’t feed any of these to the dogs, much to their dismay.

               

Tastes like:  A less-dry, teriyaki beef jerky

Taste rating:  7.5/10

Qualities:  Gluten free, Non GMO, Kosher, Vegetarian, Vegan

What’s in it:

Review: Glorious Chobani Greek Yogurts

Brand:  Chobani Greek yogurt

Flavor:  Various

Where to get it: Your local grocery store, but their site is http://www.chobani.com/

                I’ll just come right out and say it:  I love everything Chobani does. The Greek yogurt market has EXPLODED in the US in the last 2ish years, and if I’m awarding the crown, I am giving it to Chobani without extra time in the deliberation room. For one, it’s available in almost any grocery store - unlike some other “highly recommended” Greek yogurts. If I have to drive 2 hours to find a store that sells “the best” Greek yogurt, it’s not the best. Maybe it’s good, but I need access, man!

Chobani also impresses me for their variety. 0%, 2%, 100-calorie, and now they have a line with steel-cut oats already mixed in (!). My person and I saw the latter option in the store for the first time about 2 weeks ago and looked at each other skeptically. We each bought one container, thinking “eh, this is probably going to be a disaster.” It wasn’t. It was delicious. We went back to the store THAT NIGHT to get more. The apple and banana are my favorite oat ones (he fancies the blueberry), and they have comparable calories (160 vs 140) to their 0% and 2% lines. Ever calorie-counting, I more often eat from the 100-calorie line, and still get *12* grams of protein. 12 grams in 100 calories?? Fantastic job, Chobani. I’m yours.

               

Tastes like:  A tastier way to get protein than about 90% of protein powders on the market

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  All natural, Gluten free, Kosher, Vegetarian

What’s in it: Depends on flavor/line.

Blackberry 0%:

Banana Maple w/ Steel Cut Oats:

Inventive Dieting Can Be More Sweet Than Sour

Growing up in an American middle-class family in the 80’s and 90’s, I ate a lot of McDonald’s. My drug of choice was always the Chicken McNuggets. I tried other sauces, but what really made my heart sing was always the Sweet N’ Sour sauce. I was (am) so in love with this sauce, that I would literally not eat the McNuggets if they forgot to put the sauce in the bag, thus forcing my grandparents (usually) to trudge back to the McDonald’s and procure the sauce.

Now I’m an adult, with type 1 diabetes, who’s on a perpetual diet. (Sad panda, right?? Hey, it could always be worse. Never forget that.) There is literally no room for McDonald’s in my life. I can make a better salad at home than any fast food joint can make, so squash that angle. Nothing else there is “healthy,” and I mean nothing, no matter what they tell you. (Don’t get me started on their oatmeal with approximately 9,000 grams of sugar in it. I said approximately.)

Guess what though? Chicken McNuggets are still delicious. Have you ever thought of a snack from your childhood, and then eaten it as an adult, and then had your romanticized notions of how good it was SHATTERED because, for example, Twinkies are a dry, hot mess? Let me be first to tell you, this doesn’t apply to the McNugget monster. Still good, but oh so bad.

So here I am. Craving, pining, crying…trying not to crack. BUT WAIT. Something happened one night. I had an extra tub of Sweet N Sour in the fridge from a previous day when I actually did crack, and hit the drive thru (happens to the best of us, and I’m not even the best of us). Boneless, skinless chicken breast (BSCB) is pretty much the foundation of all diets that aren’t against eating meat, and mine is no exception.

I took my BSCB and started dipping little forkfuls into the Sweet N Sour tub o’heaven. YES. THIS WORKS. As my face transformed into the hilarious visage of an enraptured carnivore, a new road to happiness opened. I still like the McNuggets and I’m sure that I always will, but since the discovery of how much of my love was sauce-based, I haven’t been through drive thru for them even a single time, IN ALMOST A YEAR.

McDonald’s will sell you sauces a la carte (at least in my town) for 15 cents each. I sheepishly asked my person if he would do me a huge favor, because I was horrified at the thought of going to the restaurant and making such a weird request. He was happy to oblige (a bit of an attention-seeker, that one), and proudly came home with a bag full of 30 Sweet N Sour sauces for my slathering pleasure. According to his report, the employees were quite amused, and had to run to the back to look up the code. I’m so glad he went for me. You have no idea.

The point is…sometimes the things you feel unfulfilled without, are things you don’t have to go without. If a small tub of sugar with almost no nutritional value helps you eat lean protein dinner after dinner – eat it. If a piece of swiss cheese helps you eat 99% lean ground turkey burgers instead of 85% lean ground beef burgers – eat it. And that All Bran you’re trying to slog through each morning instead of Captain Krunch…it tastes a lot better with a teaspoon of real sugar on it, and the extra 16 calories aren’t going to slow your weight loss down one bit.

What's in it:

Review: Zouq's Curry Crunch Snack Mix

Brand:  Zouq

Flavor:  Curry Crunch

Where to get it:  here @ Zouq.com

                I love curry flavor, but I usually find actual curry a little too rich after a couple of bites, which I blame solely on most chef’s overuse of coconut milk. The awesome thing about this snack mix is that you get all of that delicious curry flavor, with none of the ooooog, too much! feeling. Zouq also splooshed a little something sweet in here, making it so much better than just a straight-up curry flavor. The tidbits are little, it’s a “sleeker” snack mix, if you will, and I absolutely loved it. Hits the spot for salty or sweet cravings, and I’m excited to see what other products they make that I might snarf up.

               

Tastes like:  Sweet and savory curry

Taste rating:  9/10

Qualities:  Vegetarian, Vegan, Gluten free

What’s in it:

Review: The Naked Edge Veggie Go's

Brand:  The Naked Edge

Flavor:  Veggie Go’s (variety)

Where to get it: here @ Abe's Market

                If *I* mixed carrots, apple & ginger together with nothing else, I’m fairly certain that the end result wouldn’t even be edible. Somehow the lovely folks at The Naked Edge take bare bones, natural ingredients, and turn them into one of the best snacks I have found in my quest for weight loss cuisine. These are a lot like Fruit Leather (we’ll talk about those in a future review), but they only have 15-20 calories per snack. Mind = blown.

               

Tastes like:  Fruit leather on a diet (but that mythical diet where you’re never hungry)

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Gluten-free, Non GMO, Kosher, Made in the USA, All natural, Organic, Vegetarian, Vegan

What’s in it:

Review: powbab baobab superfruit chews

Brand:  powbab

Flavor:  baobab superfruit chews

Where to get it: here @ powbab.com

                Even if these powbab baobab superfruit chews had no other redeeming qualities, they are an extremely tasty way to get 100% of your RDA of Vitamins C and E– which I think everyone agrees is a good thing, regardless of your nutritional school of thought. That being said, they are FULL of other good stuff too, and did I mention that they’re tasty? According to the package, one small chew packs as many antioxidants as 2.25 tomatoes, 2.5 cups of spinach and half an orange all added together. I eat one of these a day, and I feel special when I do it. If you’ve got room in your food budget for an extra $20 or so a month, spend it on these little guys! (They also have a subscription service that will save you a few bucks.)

               

Tastes like:  A supercharged Starburst

Taste rating:  10/10

Qualities:  Vegan, Fair Trade, Gluten-free, Non GMO, Made in the USA

What’s in it:

Review: Yum A Roos Caribbean Crop

Brand:  Yum-A-Roos

Flavor:  Carribean Crop

Where to get it: here @ Abe's Market

                Have you ever gone to a baby shower and played that game where you taste the different baby foods and then try to guess what flavor they are? If you have, then you know how horrible most baby food is. While these snacks aren’t for actual babies (because they have no teeth, I presume), I think they are intended for toddlers who are past the choking-risk age. Don’t quote me on this stuff, since I don’t know anything about children. I am making these assumptions because these little snacks are very healthy, but they taste so bad. The peas are the worst part (and you thought it would be the banana, didn’t you?) and I was looking all over for something to eat just to get the taste out of my mouth after one mouthful of these guys. Simple, organic ingredients…get them for your kids if they will eat them, but skip them for yourself.

               

Tastes like:  How do I get this out of my mouth?

Taste rating:  1/10

Qualities:  Organic, Made in the USA, Vegan, Gluten-free, Non GMO

What’s in it:

Review: Dixie Carb Counters Skinni Spaghetti

Brand:  Dixie Carb Counters

Flavor:  Skinni Spaghetti

Where to get it: here @ Netrition.com

                I have been a MUCH happier dieter since I discovered that there was such a thing as “protein noodles”. I’m working my way through all the different kinds I’ve found to nail down a favorite, but any way to eat something that actually tastes like traditional spaghetti without all those nasty carbs is okay with this girl. Dixie Carb Counters Skinni Spaghetti is made from soybeans, and I didn’t like it as much as I did the Explore Asia noodles made from mung beans. If you get too big of a mouthful, you can really taste the bean flavor with these noodles. It’s not a deal-breaker, but I definitely recommend using a lot of pasta sauce and chunky ingredients to help cover up the fact that it’s not wheat-based pasta you’re shoveling down.

               

Tastes like:  Bland-ish noodle-shaped beans (smother these in sauce & veggies)

Taste rating:  6/10

What’s in it:

Review: I Heart Keenwah Snacks

Brand:  I Heart Keenwah

Flavor:  Ginger Peanut Quinoa Clusters

Where to get it: here @ Abe's Market

                Peanut brittle has fallen a bit out of fashion, in my opinion, but there are a handful of specialty companies bringing brittle back, baby! I Heart Keenwah is doing a pretty good job of keeping the old-fashioned taste for dying in a cut glass candy bowl on your grandmother’s end table. The ginger in these makes them exceptional, and I LOVE that they come in tiny snack bags. If you’re at all a fan of peanut brittle, you won’t be able to put these down.

               

Tastes like:  Peanut brittle, without the stickiness

Taste rating:  8/10

Qualities:  Gluten-free

What’s in it:

Review: Tealish Dessert Teas

Brand:  Tealish

Flavor:  Toasty Almond & Dulce de Leche

Where to get it: here @ Tealish

                Oolong, now that’s my jam. Black tea is my other jam. Herbal tea…is not really my jam. That being said, I was pleasantly surprised that I liked the Tealish (herbal) Toasty Almond as much as I did. Hit it with just a little bit of milk (pick a milk, any milk), put on your favorite pair of slipper socks, and sit your tired butt down. The Dulce de Leche variety is an oolong, and I loved it as much as I expected I would. Subtly sweet, but not syrupy, I wish someone could make cupcake frosting this light and subtle. They have an expansive line of other dessert flavors, as well as non-dessert teas, and a simply delightful website.

               

Tastes like:  A light caramel whipped cream cloud

Taste rating:  8/10

What’s in it:

Toasty Almond:  INGREDIENTS: Apple pieces, almond slivers, cinnamon pieces, flavoring, beetroot pieces.

Dulce de Leche:  INGREDIENTS: Oolong teas, caramel pieces (sugar, milk), flavoring, marigold petals.

Juice Cleanse Final Day (!!) Recap

Day 3 - I made it! Not a carrot, not an egg white, not a single piece of solid food passed my lips in 3 days. I can't believe it, it seems very surreal to me. I think the overall experience was a good one. If I did it again with Jus by Julie, I would select my juices ala carte next time. It's REALLY hard if you hate a particular juice, and it's on the menu all 3 days.

It also kind of bothers me that services like this are advertised as ways to "kickstart" a healthy lifestyle. If me, version 1.5 years ago had tried this, I wouldn't have made it through the first afternoon. I feel like if you've made peace with self-deprivation already, you will have a much better chance of being able to do a program like this. I ended up losing 7 lbs over the course of the 3 days, but I'm not going to weigh myself again for another few days to see how much of it is "real". Hopefully, my brain has gotten a much-needed reset and this plateau is dead on the floor.

Day 3 Intake:

Morning Glory – NOPE

Spicy Lemonade

Sweet Spin

Acai Blend – (10/10, 150 calories) YUM! My favorite juice of the cleanse. Banana is prominent flavor, but it’s perfectly tempered with the other ingredients.

Island Coconut – (10/10, 200 calories) This was also SO YUM! I would rather drink this than a milkshake. Not even lying.

Xtreme Greens

Nutritional Breakdown:

Total Calories:  730

Carbs:  162g

Fat:  14g

Protein:  12g

Have mercy on my soul, I'm doing a 3-day juice fast!

I hit a weight-loss plateau about 3 months ago, and I’ve tried a lot of things to bust through it – to largely no avail. I read this article about a lovely gal from Britain who is also a type 1 diabetic, and she had a very successful and fulfilling 3-day juice fast. The company she used is overseas from me, so I set out to find an affordable alternative in America. I actually found Jus by Julie because there was a Groupon for it. This led me to their website, which is awesome. They also have a ton of good Yelp reviews, so I decided this was the way to go.

I’ve never done something like this before, and I’m pretty nervous. I had dreams about it all last night, and slept like poo. I’m not really sure why I have so much anxiety, I chose to do this, no one’s making me, and I can quit on it if I really want to. But still. The most challenging this is going to be balancing my insulin intake, because a few hypoglycemic incidents WILL sabotage this in a hurry. Wish me luck!

Review: Yuki No Yado Snow Senbei

Brand:  Yuki No Yado Senbei

Flavor:  Cream Frosted

Where to get it: here @ Yahiro Mart

                “Healthy” is a very subjective word. Sometimes, it just means low-calorie…and that’s the excuse I’m using to review these here on my “healthy snacks blog”.  It’s okay if you disagree with me, I still love you.  I do. I also love these senbei.  I ate a package of these “by accident” because it came in one of my monthly subscription snack boxes.  I swiftly scoured the internet for somewhere that would sell me mass quantities of these magical little Japanese crackers. They really don’t have any nutritional value, AND there is MSG in them to boot (boo!), BUT they really hit the spot during that lull after lunch where I just HAVE to have something that’s quasi-junk food. At only 73 calories for the whole package (2 pieces), I deem these guilt free!

Tastes like:  Salty, crunchy, sweet corn

Taste rating:  10/10

What’s in it:

Review: Smartfood White Cheddar & Kettle Corn Popcorn

Brand:  Smart Food

Flavor:  White Cheddar and Kettle Corn

Where to get it:  here @ FreshDirect.com (I had some trouble finding the box with both kinds online, check your local grocery store)

                Popcorn is a dangerous snack.  Do it wrong, and it’s worse than chips.  Do it right, and it usually tastes like garbage. I was excited to come across these little bags at the store, only 90-100 calories each! It’s hard to moderate with the *scary horror music* BIG BAG of this stuff, and I usually find myself in “Doing It Wrong!” territory before the first commercial break. With these smaller sizes, you can’t do it wrong…accidentally. When the bag is empty, it’s empty. There are significantly more kernels in the white cheddar bags, but I still really like the kettle corn bags as well. Both make great snacks.

Tastes like:  Popcorn that won’t make you hate yourself

Taste rating:  10/10

What’s in it:

Review: Kirkland Signature Freeze-Dried Fuji Apple Slices

Brand:  Kirkland Signature

Flavor:  Fuji Apple Slices

Where to get it: here @ Costco.com, or in stores 

                The difference between dried and freeze-dried (aside from the obvious textural difference), is sweetness, in my opinion. Sometimes I don’t want a super sweet snack, but I’m a true Washington girl, and I love that apple flavor. These are a little bit tart, but not Granny Smith levels of tart. They also come in cinnamon, and those are just as delicious. The calories basically don’t even exist…if you put down 3 bags of these in a day, you’d still be kicking fat’s fat ass.

Tastes like:  Dry, crunchy apples (in a good way)

Taste rating:  9/10
Qualities:  Vegan

What’s in it:

Review: The Daily Crave Veggie Sticks

Brand:  The Daily Crave

Flavor:  Veggie Sticks

Where to get it: here @ Soap.com

                Potatoes are a vegetable. Sadly, that's the "veggie" in this veggie sticks. Due to the packaging and the name, I think I was expecting these not to only taste like potatoes. I don’t know what I wanted them to taste like, something unique and different, I suppose. Once I got over the fact that I wasn’t consuming magical carrot-beet-turnip sticks, these were pretty good. Lots of salt, which I find absolutely crucial in some of these healthy snacks – otherwise they end up tasting a lot like Styrofoam. If you’re craving a salty potato snack, these won’t break your diet. If you’re craving something new and different, maybe try Googling a recipe for homemade magical carrot-beet-turnip sticks instead.

Tastes like:  Salted puffy potatoes

Taste rating:  5/10

What’s in it:

Review: Power Crunch Protein Bar

Brand:  Power Crunch

Flavor:  French Vanilla Creme

Where to get it: here @ PowerCrunch.com

                I really like that these bars have the thin, crispy wafers in them like those cookies we’ve all had, I haven’t found a lot of protein bars that do. I also like that they are SO VANILLA. So. Vanilla. Even the vanilla smell is really strong. If you like vanilla protein powder, you will really like these bars. My only complaint/piece of advice is – make sure you have a bottle of water when you’re eating this bar. It was kind of like the saltine challenge at times, as soon as I broke through the outer coating, all the saliva in my mouth just went POOF! I also found that the wafers stuck to my teeth sort of weirdly, but it wasn’t terrible.

Tastes like:  Vanilla crème wafer cookies crossed with unsalted saltine crackers

Taste rating:  7/10

What’s in it:

Review: Skinny Girl Banana Oatmeal Dark Chocolate Bars

Brand:  Skinny Girl

Flavor:  Banana Oatmeal Dark Chocolate

Where to get it: here @ Drugstore.com

                I LOVE all things banana. Unfortunately, it’s one of the WORST artificial flavors ever invented. When banana-flavored things are bad, they are OMG-GET-THIS-AWAY-FROM-MY-FACE-DO-YOU-HAVE –ANY-DIRT-I-CAN-CLEANSE-MY-PALATE-WITH bad. In this particular product, they do it the right way. I didn’t have high expectations, but I was pleasantly surprised. The chocolate isn’t too bitter or overpowering, the banana flavor comes through, but not in a slap-your-mama kind of way, and the bars are really soft and oat-y. A bit high on the calorie side (180) for me to pound these as snacks on a daily basis, but if you’re under your calorie threshold, or just worked out super hard, this is a great treat.

Tastes like:  The perfect balance I’m always trying to find between chocolate and banana

Taste rating:  8/10

What’s in it: